Emails and spouses

So this whole spouses reading each others email and texts is bothering me. ALOT!

Before I begin, G and I don't check each others emails or phones. If the spouse wants the me to read something, then it's different.

So, these days I am finding it very hard to email a few of my friends. They are married and their spouses regularly check my friends emails and read emails that are not addressed to them. When I write my mails, I am writing with the satisfaction and knowledge that I am pouring my heart out to my friend. Even if it's not a sniff-sniff kinda email, if they are just forwards, why should someone, other than the person I am addressing my email to, read them? Isn't it a breach of my trust? I find it even more humiliating if I am not even informed that there could be other people reading my emails.

So this SIL informs me casually that every morning she checks her emails and then her husbands, who is my cousin. And I am like WTH??? I send emails to my brother and not to you right? I didn't say anything to her, obviously. I brought it up with the brother. "Well what can I do? She is my wife, she will read my emails".

In another instance, everytime I write to my friend, and even if her husband is not copied on it, he will reply. Thankfully he tells me it is he, else I would wonder where all the macho-ism was coming from. But when I asked her, she said she told him to write back to me. But I wasn't sharing my concerns with him, why did you have to tell him about it?

So then I started to wonder, is it just G and I who don't invade each other's privacy? Does being married mean that you have to share all your friends secrets, jokes , problems with your spouse? That just seems so unfair to the other friends. Does it bother anyone else?

If someone writes an email to me, I can guarantee you, no one other than me will read it.