I am so sick and tired of people who claim to come to work 'even when I am sick'. Apparently you will look weak in the eyes of the employer if you take a sick day. What does that mean? If you are sick, you are sick. Do a favor to others around you and be home and don't come to work and spread the germs. That is how I feel and I would appreciate others to do the same. This nonsense about looking weak really irritated me. How is being sick, your fault? Why would your boss look at you and think you are weak if you have a cold?
Showing posts with label working. Show all posts
Showing posts with label working. Show all posts
Monday, November 04, 2013
Wednesday, November 09, 2011
Tomorrow won't be like today
And I mean that quite literally.
So if you know me at all, like the guy who meets me when I go to get water at the water cooler in the office or the eyebrow lady, who I visit once in 6 weeks, you will know that my kids are about to go to Montessori. Or to put it simply, will not be at home 24 X 7. I let everyone and anyone in on this fear of mine, this one thing I don't want to do.
So why are we doing it then? Well, lots of reasons.
- One would think that being twins, M n N would be born socialites - well, not much at all. They aren't good around other kids when not at home. Bring a party over to the house and they're great, but go to the park and they don't want to interact with other kids.
- The Nanny . She's been one helluva nanny for the past 21 months. Don't get me wrong, but she is not growing with the kids. She doesn't do the things one would expect to do with a toddler. Read to them, sing and play with them or teach them colors and shapes. She is just good for feeding.
- Because I don't want to find another Nanny.
So school it is.
I had written the above the day before kids started school. So much has happened since. They have been in school for almost 4 weeks now. The last day - 13th Oct - before they started school, I was an emotional wreck. I didn't want to send my babies to school, it felt like I was coming back to work after the kids birth for the first time, all over again.
So now that we are in school, uniform and all, we are better with putting things back in place, so much so that when we see Mommy/Daddy sitting without their shoes on, we get the shoes to them and force them to wear them, after all the rightful place for shoes are on the feet! We have also become very aware of what is ours and what is not. We are territorial about our sweaters, shoes and cups. (Since M n N have these clearly marked out, we have to follow the rules, cannot falter). The teacher Ms J has also noticed about this and commented on it. I don't know if this is going to cause them to be un-sharing, but right now it is good, they like to drink from their own sippy cups and it gives me hope that they will not drink random things. Yeah..didn't you know already I like in a country called Utopia?
We are becoming more talkative! We saw a lot more words now, try our best communicate and are constantly talking. Esp. M. She has things to say all the time. We also ask after each other. Like the other day when N had a gag reflex, M looked at him, pointed to her mouth and said something in abracadabra , N in turn - pointed to his mouth and replied in abracadabra and then both resumed their earlier activity of fiddling with their seat belts.
We also don't like to eat dinner anymore! Mom loves to force us to eat, but she forgets in this house, We rule.
So after that little interlude by twins I am back to regular programming. I am glad the kids are doing well in the Montessori and becoming more aware of people, things and actions. I used to hate the fact that they wouldn't be home, till I realised, what is the point, when we are not home! And this single realisation has made me sleep better and be more relaxed. It may seem little to you, but it's been my all consuming thought. I am just glad that they like school, like to explore and learn and are generally well behaved kids. I use the word generally very liberally ;)
Phew! took a month to finish this post! I will try and be more regular.
So if you know me at all, like the guy who meets me when I go to get water at the water cooler in the office or the eyebrow lady, who I visit once in 6 weeks, you will know that my kids are about to go to Montessori. Or to put it simply, will not be at home 24 X 7. I let everyone and anyone in on this fear of mine, this one thing I don't want to do.
So why are we doing it then? Well, lots of reasons.
- One would think that being twins, M n N would be born socialites - well, not much at all. They aren't good around other kids when not at home. Bring a party over to the house and they're great, but go to the park and they don't want to interact with other kids.
- The Nanny . She's been one helluva nanny for the past 21 months. Don't get me wrong, but she is not growing with the kids. She doesn't do the things one would expect to do with a toddler. Read to them, sing and play with them or teach them colors and shapes. She is just good for feeding.
- Because I don't want to find another Nanny.
So school it is.
I had written the above the day before kids started school. So much has happened since. They have been in school for almost 4 weeks now. The last day - 13th Oct - before they started school, I was an emotional wreck. I didn't want to send my babies to school, it felt like I was coming back to work after the kids birth for the first time, all over again.
So now that we are in school, uniform and all, we are better with putting things back in place, so much so that when we see Mommy/Daddy sitting without their shoes on, we get the shoes to them and force them to wear them, after all the rightful place for shoes are on the feet! We have also become very aware of what is ours and what is not. We are territorial about our sweaters, shoes and cups. (Since M n N have these clearly marked out, we have to follow the rules, cannot falter). The teacher Ms J has also noticed about this and commented on it. I don't know if this is going to cause them to be un-sharing, but right now it is good, they like to drink from their own sippy cups and it gives me hope that they will not drink random things. Yeah..didn't you know already I like in a country called Utopia?
We are becoming more talkative! We saw a lot more words now, try our best communicate and are constantly talking. Esp. M. She has things to say all the time. We also ask after each other. Like the other day when N had a gag reflex, M looked at him, pointed to her mouth and said something in abracadabra , N in turn - pointed to his mouth and replied in abracadabra and then both resumed their earlier activity of fiddling with their seat belts.
We also don't like to eat dinner anymore! Mom loves to force us to eat, but she forgets in this house, We rule.
So after that little interlude by twins I am back to regular programming. I am glad the kids are doing well in the Montessori and becoming more aware of people, things and actions. I used to hate the fact that they wouldn't be home, till I realised, what is the point, when we are not home! And this single realisation has made me sleep better and be more relaxed. It may seem little to you, but it's been my all consuming thought. I am just glad that they like school, like to explore and learn and are generally well behaved kids. I use the word generally very liberally ;)
Phew! took a month to finish this post! I will try and be more regular.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Working Mom guilt strikes
My kids have a really nice Nanny. She is tolerant and patient. The kids esp. M love her! And that must mean that I am very happy with the situation right? WRONG!
So here's what happened. A few days back, I worked my butt off drove an hour each way (just trying to emphasize how hard I have to work to get the ketchup on the table ), I reach home and the kids are happy and lolling around. They see me and give me a big smile, when I go to grab M so I can kiss that face, she turns away. She goes to the Nanny and refuses to come to me. She's just happy there. My feelings really hurt, I turn to N and pick him up. He's a good boy though and does the dutiful laughing and gurgling. But my heart is aching and so I go again to M, but she is happy in her Auntie's lap. I put on a brave face and don't let my feelings show. A few minutes after, the Nanny leaves and now I am M's center of the world. Smart child this?!
Everyday, I get to spend at the most 4 hours with the kids. I reach home at 6 and the kids get sleepy by 8-8:30. I get a little bit over an hour in the morning with them. That's it!
But this past week, has been worst! I have been leaving home at 7 and reaching home around 7, so I get not even 2 hours with them. And those 2 hours include getting dinner on the table and having my laptop on and trying to write a few lines of code in between feeding the kids, playing with them, changing them etc etc. I feel terrible. I miss them so much!
So this weekend, I made the most of it. I spent as much time with them as possible, did the whole Ashtmi pooja with them, made them some halwa and then we all loaded up in the car and we spent half the day shopping for the twinardoes. And might I just add that shopping for boys sucks, whereas it is a paradise for girls! Got the cutest outfits for M. Poor N though is stuck with blue and brown. Sorry N, I will look elsewhere for your clothes.
But back to my guilt, Monday mornings are the worst! The weekends seem to rush by and then Monday morning comes. Although the kids don't cry when we leave, but it's the most frustrating thing to do.
What doesn't help is Mom friends who stay at home. One such friend when holding M says to her, 'You are with Mom every day....i mean the whole weekend...' I was dumb founded. Was there the need of the correction and stress the point?
A neighbor was very frank when she told me the other day, that she sends her kid to a certain day care because it is worry free, they even don't ask you to give diaper or formula. And you can drop the kid off as early as 6:30. She said candidly, I know I don't have to worry and I can go to work as early as possible come back by 4:30. She didn't feel bad at all saying this and when I told her I respected her attitude, she told me she doesn't care for others, what works for her she does, the others be damned. Her kids were happy too and didn't mind it. They have a routine too and they love sleeping in on weekends, much to the Mom's happiness. Now isn't that nice?
But I am sure people will find fault with this and will tell her how she is a horrible Mom for waking her kids up that early etc etc. There is no winning situation.
I don't know If I would rather stay home and be with the kids. I guess in a idle world yes, but the way things are right now, I have to go to work everyday. Every day when I close the door behind me, as I leave for work, I wish for a few more minutes with the kids. I have no idea where the time went and they got so big. They are 10 months now.
So here's what happened. A few days back, I worked my butt off drove an hour each way (just trying to emphasize how hard I have to work to get the ketchup on the table ), I reach home and the kids are happy and lolling around. They see me and give me a big smile, when I go to grab M so I can kiss that face, she turns away. She goes to the Nanny and refuses to come to me. She's just happy there. My feelings really hurt, I turn to N and pick him up. He's a good boy though and does the dutiful laughing and gurgling. But my heart is aching and so I go again to M, but she is happy in her Auntie's lap. I put on a brave face and don't let my feelings show. A few minutes after, the Nanny leaves and now I am M's center of the world. Smart child this?!
Everyday, I get to spend at the most 4 hours with the kids. I reach home at 6 and the kids get sleepy by 8-8:30. I get a little bit over an hour in the morning with them. That's it!
But this past week, has been worst! I have been leaving home at 7 and reaching home around 7, so I get not even 2 hours with them. And those 2 hours include getting dinner on the table and having my laptop on and trying to write a few lines of code in between feeding the kids, playing with them, changing them etc etc. I feel terrible. I miss them so much!
So this weekend, I made the most of it. I spent as much time with them as possible, did the whole Ashtmi pooja with them, made them some halwa and then we all loaded up in the car and we spent half the day shopping for the twinardoes. And might I just add that shopping for boys sucks, whereas it is a paradise for girls! Got the cutest outfits for M. Poor N though is stuck with blue and brown. Sorry N, I will look elsewhere for your clothes.
But back to my guilt, Monday mornings are the worst! The weekends seem to rush by and then Monday morning comes. Although the kids don't cry when we leave, but it's the most frustrating thing to do.
What doesn't help is Mom friends who stay at home. One such friend when holding M says to her, 'You are with Mom every day....i mean the whole weekend...' I was dumb founded. Was there the need of the correction and stress the point?
A neighbor was very frank when she told me the other day, that she sends her kid to a certain day care because it is worry free, they even don't ask you to give diaper or formula. And you can drop the kid off as early as 6:30. She said candidly, I know I don't have to worry and I can go to work as early as possible come back by 4:30. She didn't feel bad at all saying this and when I told her I respected her attitude, she told me she doesn't care for others, what works for her she does, the others be damned. Her kids were happy too and didn't mind it. They have a routine too and they love sleeping in on weekends, much to the Mom's happiness. Now isn't that nice?
But I am sure people will find fault with this and will tell her how she is a horrible Mom for waking her kids up that early etc etc. There is no winning situation.
I don't know If I would rather stay home and be with the kids. I guess in a idle world yes, but the way things are right now, I have to go to work everyday. Every day when I close the door behind me, as I leave for work, I wish for a few more minutes with the kids. I have no idea where the time went and they got so big. They are 10 months now.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Cloudy on a Sunny day
That's exactly how I feel right now.
My mind wants to contribute to all the glorious programs I am supposed to be writing, but the heart really is somewhere else. I think I know why, I've had difficult conversations with 3 separate people at work in the past 10 days. And 2 of those people have designations which have the word 'Chief' in it. (Tells you how stupid I am isn't it?).
It's not that I am a difficult to get along with, It's just I have been trying to make a point to everyone that people should just do their job, if everyone did their bits, the world wouldn't come crashing down on the rest of us who are taking up jobs of those slackers. I am tired of picking up the phone asking a question and always getting the same response 'I don't know' or sometimes it's 'I didn't know, I was supposed to do that'. It's you job damn it!
So well...I'm glad I've talked about this here, now I've vented.
Oh..another thing is..I'm getting my Tuesdays and Wednesdays mixed up every week. I wake up on Tuesday knowing it's Tuesday, coz I fast on those days, but somehow during the day, my mind had a timer of it's own, the day becomes Wednesday and I get a rude shock when i realise that it's not Wednesday yet. And then on Wednesday, I take the trash out, check the sprinkler coz those are Wednesday jobs and then somewhere in the day, the timer goes a day back!!!! But this makes Thursday (more) the best day of the week!!!
The cloud is hanging low, but the sun is trying it's best. We'll just see how today goes. And hopefully rain will come and all shall be happy and good again :)
My mind wants to contribute to all the glorious programs I am supposed to be writing, but the heart really is somewhere else. I think I know why, I've had difficult conversations with 3 separate people at work in the past 10 days. And 2 of those people have designations which have the word 'Chief' in it. (Tells you how stupid I am isn't it?).
It's not that I am a difficult to get along with, It's just I have been trying to make a point to everyone that people should just do their job, if everyone did their bits, the world wouldn't come crashing down on the rest of us who are taking up jobs of those slackers. I am tired of picking up the phone asking a question and always getting the same response 'I don't know' or sometimes it's 'I didn't know, I was supposed to do that'. It's you job damn it!
So well...I'm glad I've talked about this here, now I've vented.
Oh..another thing is..I'm getting my Tuesdays and Wednesdays mixed up every week. I wake up on Tuesday knowing it's Tuesday, coz I fast on those days, but somehow during the day, my mind had a timer of it's own, the day becomes Wednesday and I get a rude shock when i realise that it's not Wednesday yet. And then on Wednesday, I take the trash out, check the sprinkler coz those are Wednesday jobs and then somewhere in the day, the timer goes a day back!!!! But this makes Thursday (more) the best day of the week!!!
The cloud is hanging low, but the sun is trying it's best. We'll just see how today goes. And hopefully rain will come and all shall be happy and good again :)
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